Regardless of the stage of their cognitive decline, taking the time to visit a loved one with dementia is important for their overall cognitive health and well-being.
There are no set rules on how often you should visit your loved one. Individuals with dementia respond well to short but frequent and consistent visits from their loved ones.
If your loved one has just moved into a memory care community, allow them to adjust to their new space before making frequent visits, as visiting frequently can make the adjustment period more difficult.
Why You Should Visit Your Loved One
Having a loved one in memory care typically means that their dementia includes difficulties with memory. However, regardless of the advancement of dementia-related cognitive decline, taking the time to visit plays an important role in your loved one’s well-being.
People with dementia can feel a sense of inclusion and worth when visited. Despite difficulty with memory retention, they can still retain emotional memory, so seeing a loved one can encourage feelings of familiarity, comfort, and safety.
Even if your loved one can’t remember their relationship to visitors, they may still enjoy seeing you! Dementia can cause individuals to socially isolate and withdraw from others because communication becomes difficult. Visiting your loved one can help promote social activity and engagement, which can help stimulate cognitive function and help their overall well-being.
When you visit your loved one, their mood will improve. However, the nature of their condition makes them prone to mood swings and changes in behavior. Within 30 minutes of the visit, your loved one’s mood may return to its previous state. Consider keeping visits frequent but brief in hopes of keeping the visit light and joyful!
Importance of Creating Routine Visits
Creating a routine around your visit helps provide a sense of stability for your loved one. Routine visits can reduce anxiety and confusion, providing a comfortable space for your visit. Try to visit at the same times and days each week.
Regular visits at consistent times can also help with memory retention. When your loved one knows when to expect you, this can trigger memory—and recognition. If they’re able to remember your upcoming visit, this provides them with something exciting to look forward to!
Guidelines to Consider When Visiting Your Loved One
To make the most of your visits, keep them brief but frequent. Focus on the quality of your visit over quantity. It’s better to have short, quality visits where your loved one is engaged rather than long visits that may frustrate or overstimulate them.
Creating a consistent visiting schedule helps establish a visiting routine, which an individual with dementia will respond well to. If you’d like to plan a specific activity ahead of time, you’re more than welcome to, but be flexible in your expectations for the visit.
Just because your loved one responded well to an activity during a previous visit doesn’t mean that you’ll get the same response in the future. Due to the nature of dementia, every day is different and will bring about its own set of challenges. What works today may not work tomorrow.
Maintaining your relationship and connection with your loved one should be the focus of your visit. No matter their mood or stage of cognitive decline, you’re still bonding together!
Be Present & Attentive
Being present and attentive during your visits is crucial. Put away distractions like your phone and focus entirely on your loved one. Finding a quiet space with no distractions helps create a comfortable mood.
Listen to your loved one, even if they repeat themselves, and show genuine interest in what they have to say. Not all communication is verbal. Embrace any silent moments and appreciate the time you spend together.
Engaging in activities that your loved one enjoys can make your visits more enjoyable for both of you. Whether it’s playing a card game, gardening, or watching their favorite TV show, these activities can provide a sense of normalcy and fun.
Respect Their Space & Mood
Be mindful of your loved one’s energy and mood. The nature of their condition makes them subject to sudden shifts in moods. Try to keep your visit brief. However, if their mood begins to shift, acknowledge their frustrations and don’t be dismissive of their feelings.
Visits can sometimes trigger strong emotional reactions, both positive and negative. Be prepared for these moments and handle them with compassion and understanding. If your loved one becomes agitated or upset, try to remain calm and soothing.
If they appear overstimulated, try to create a calm, peaceful environment. Suggest going on a walk together, or another activity, or moving to a new space.
There may be days when your loved one is tired or less receptive to visitors. Respect their space and consider shortening your visit or simply sitting quietly with them for a while..
Keep it Simple
Avoid overwhelming your loved one. Too many activities or too many visitors may overstimulate them.
One-on-one time is usually the best choice. Occasional small group gatherings can be okay, but be mindful of how your loved one responds.
Engage in activities that your loved one enjoys or activities that stimulate memory, vision, and touch. Sharing and reminiscing through old photos and stories can help stimulate their memory.
Be Flexible
Manage expectations for each visit. What works today may not work tomorrow. The “success” of your visit is often influenced by factors outside of your control, like your loved one’s mood, energy, and cognitive abilities for that day.
Be flexible in your planning. If your loved one doesn’t respond well to a planned activity, validate their feelings, and suggest something new.
Schedule a Visit!
Maintaining a relationship with your loved one is important regardless of the progression of their dementia. Being consistent in your visits and focusing on quality time is a great way to support your loved one. Caring for a loved one requires a community. Connect with our team at All American Assisted Living at Wrentham to learn more about the benefits of memory care.
